Family Langenhoven Young
Thank you for reading this post, don't forget to subscribe!As fun-loving outdoor enthusiasts my husband, Jacques, and I met scuba diving in 2009, 12 years ago! It was love at first sight… We never spent a minute apart after meeting.
In 2011, our daughter, Madison, arrived and two years later we decided we wanted to get married. Both having extensive experience in the industry, we started our own design and shop fitting business in 2014. Life and love continued to grow from strength to strength. 2015 saw the arrival of our son, Jonathan, into this world. Now our little family of four felt complete. At every opportunity we would spend precious time together as a family with holidays and weekends away at the seaside or in the African bush.
In 2019, Jacques had the opportunity to visit New Zealand (NZ) and whilst there was offered work at a joinery company. With the current state of affairs in South Africa (SA), where corruption and crime are the order of the day, it was an offer we simply could not refuse. We wanted to start a new life with a bright future for our two children in NZ.
For the first time in our marriage Jacques and I would be separated. In our home in Somerset West in Cape Town I sat with tears rolling down my cheeks. They were bitter-sweet feelings of heartbreak and excitement. It was a clear decision we had made together as husband and wife that this was IT! This was the chance we had been hoping and praying for, for the last 5 years. We were taking it. Ready to start a new life, ready to start all over again… A small price to pay for safety, security and relative peace of mind.
After explaining to Madi and Jono our plans to relocate to NZ and why Mom and Dad felt it was the best thing for us to do as a family, I finally got my head around the fact that we would be apart for three to four months while I closed our business, sold our home, furniture and cars, as well as sorted out our personal effects.
Jacques started his new role in Auckland in December 2019. By February 2020, after submitting all documents to Immigration New Zealand (INZ) for our visas, we were ready to head to Johannesburg to say farewell to family there… I received an email from INZ to say that we had been assigned a case officer. I was asked by our case officer to send a supporting document through, which I did straight away. I remember feeling so excited that day and so hopeful that our visas were going to be sent through to us any day.
We had been meticulous with all of our paperwork and we checked and cross- checked every step of the way. Police clearances were sorted. Medicals were passed with flying colours. Unabridged Marriage and Birth Certificates – check. Proof of relationship documents and photo stories had all been uploaded online. Every document was ready and placed in a file in perfect order.
I packed 6 suitcases and arrived with our two children and precious dog at a guest house in Johannesburg in transit to Auckland – or so we thought!
Covid-19 hit and the NZ border closed. I was in denial… It won’t last long. It can’t last long. I am sure “it will be over in a month or two max” I remember explaining to the children. I was glued to the News – trying to stay abreast of the Covid situation as it moved across each continent affecting so many lives in so many ways.
I emailed INZ on a weekly basis asking when our visas would be approved and sent to us. Jacques also called them weekly in NZ asking for updates. Sadly, the only response we both received each time was that the NZ border is closed at this time and visas would not be processed. When border exemptions for travel became available, we would apply and then be informed they were denied time after time.
Jacques had found us a gorgeous little home, bought furniture and a car for us and was all ready for us to arrive. He has been working SO hard to support two households.
Our hearts are broken. “Mommy, will we ever see Daddy again” my 5-year-old would ask… How do you answer that without bursting into tears? How do you console your sobbing 8-year-old who just wants her Daddy to come home?
Autumn arrived and winter rolled in… still no positive news for us as a family. Many days and nights were filled with tears and despair.
Home schooling is the order of the day now, and after 6 months in a guest house we are now living in my Aunt’s home to bring some sort of normality back into our lives. It’s an understatement to say that it is so hard not having your own space.
Madi and Jono have now each celebrated two birthdays without their Dad. There have been two Christmases as a broken family, two wedding anniversaries, two Mother’s Days and two Father’s Days now without each other.
Jono has learned to swim and ride a bike all by himself without his Dad there to cheer him on in person. We FaceTime every day, BUT it’s not the same. The hugs, the kisses, the bedtime stories, the weekends away, the Friday night movie night huddled together on the couch as a family – that has all been taken away from us just because of Covid, Governments, leaders, lack of efficient systems and a HUGE lack of empathy.
We have been separated from Jacques now for 570 days – 18 gruelling months. It’s been the hardest thing we have ever had to deal with as such a close-knit family, BUT we are not giving up on our dream or on each other. We are determined to get through this despite the agony and heartache we experience each day we are apart.
Family Ahooja Singh Panwar
My name is Shikha Ahooja and I’m a 41-year-old Indian National that has been working in Dubai since 2005. My husband, Lakhbir Singh Pawar, is a 45-year-old Kiwi Indian who has been working in New Zealand since 2006.
We met each other on Shaadi.com in 2017. We are fortunate to have found each other, as we inherently understand each other. We are currently in a Long-Distance Relationship. It is the second marriage for both of us and we wanted to give time each other sufficient time to get to know each other. We waited for a full year before we met. In December 2017, Lakhbir finally came to Dubai to meet me and we spent the entire time enjoying different activities and getting to know each other.
We introduced each other to our respective families and everyone was delighted and accepting of us as a couple. In July 2018, Lakhbir planned a vacation in Dubai which would follow our marriage in India and his family had also agreed for me to join him in NZ.
We lodged our first partnership-based visa application with Immigration New Zealand (INZ) in August 2018, which was declined due to not having lived together and therefore could not satisfy the partnership requirements. I reapplied in September 2018 and this was again declined. In October 2018 we applied again but this time used a Licensed Immigration Advisor. Despite submitting additional documents, this was declined. In July 2019, INZ again declined my application based on the lack of living together evidence. Covid-19 restrictions have only made it increasingly difficult to be able to meet this requirement.
We firmly believe that the NZ Government should provide a timeline for when we will be able to travel to NZ. Until I am able to visit NZ as a visitor and spend time living with my husband in NZ, I cannot meet the requirements to be granted a partnership-based visa.
With all the current restrictions we at least need some hope as to when we will be able to see each other again. While others are enjoying time with their families, spending birthdays and other anniversaries together, we are only counting down the days that we will be able to be together.
It feels as though we are living in the Middle Ages and all we are hearing is how the NZ Government wants everyone to “Be Kind”. We are human beings with emotions – how long do we have to wait? I simply want to see my husband and I’m looking for some hope that this will be possible.
We are losing a lot of precious time that we should have spent with each other.
Family Kumar
I am an ordinary person who barely posts anything on social media. However, if this is the way to have my voice heard, then so be it. I am going to do everything that I can to be reunited with my family.
I wouldn’t call this a ‘story’, as it is not for entertainment purposes. Here’s a snapshot of the journey of my life since we decided to move to New Zealand (NZ)…
Before arriving in NZ in February 2020, I was working in one of the top international schools in China. I earned a much higher salary than what I am now earning in NZ and was living a great life with my husband, Karan, and now 11-years old daughter, Lanaya, who was 9-years old when I last saw her.
When I applied for a position in NZ in 2019, the NZ Teaching Council did not recognise my online degree from the University of Nottingham (UK) and suggested that I redo my teacher training course that involves practicums. Instead of undertaking my course elsewhere (which I could have done at a much lower cost), we decided to invest our future in NZ as this is where we wanted to raise our daughter. I quit my job and we sold our house back in India to pay for my education and living costs in NZ.
What we initially thought would be a 3 month separation (with my family’s plan to visit me in April 2020 and finally join me permanently in NZ in July 2020) has now turned into an endless wait with absolutely no assurance from the NZ Government on when will I be able to be reunited with my family.
At the beginning of 2021 I obtained an Essential Skills Work Visa (ESWV) after securing a job as a secondary school teacher. Teaching is a highly skilled job that involves shaping the future generation of NZ. And yet, my own future is uncertain because of the bureaucracy.
Two months ago, the Government announced exceptions for those holding a current visa to enter NZ. However, my family’s visa had expired exactly 16 days before the announcement. Another way for the families of highly skilled migrants to come to NZ is for the migrant to be earning twice the median salary or $106,080 per year. Even earning among the top pay scales due to my years of teaching experience, there is no way I could ever reach the threshold of $106,080 (Immigration NZ’s current border exemption requirement for eligibility as ‘highly skilled’) as a teacher in NZ. I have filed the Expression of Interest, but the pool selection is temporarily suspended, with no news on when it is going to reopen. A border exemption request for my family to travel to NZ has also been declined.
I am devastated. At times, I feel like quitting, but we have nowhere to go – no job in China to go back to, and no house in India. I wake up at night thinking it’s all a dreadful dream until I realise it’s reality. Travel has been my passion, and I had always wanted to explore NZ. I have hardly been to the next block of the street from where I live unless it’s for work. I have no motivation to get up out of bed on weekends. My daughter cries for me every day. The worst thing is that she doesn’t do it in front of me because she knows she’ll make me cry too. My heart aches to think of the tremendous agony and despair she’s enduring at such a young age. Not to mention the physical, mental, emotional and financial hardship of my husband, who has been taking care of our child more like a single parent, 24/7, especially with the online schooling in India due to the Covid-19 restrictions. This treatment is not expected from a country like NZ that says it values mental health and wellbeing.
Life is short and uncertain. The time I have lost rejoicing with my family will never come back. I do not want to wake up one day realising that I had been away from family all this time for nothing. I miss my family dearly. All I am asking is for them to be here with me in NZ. At least have a plan. Let us know a feasible way to bring them here.
494 days separated from my family and still counting…
(The following given content is courtesy reunitefamiliesnz blog posts)